A Dick By Any Other Name..

Is still a dick.

To all the transgenders, post-ops, transsexuals, chicks-with-dicks, she-males, ladyboys, cross-dressers, transvestites, etc.,

If you feel you were born in the "wrong" body, this may very well be true.

It is said that some souls change their minds minutes before birth. They decide to complete their life's journey as the opposite of their originally chosen sex. Such last minute decisions don't work so well because by the time you're in the birth canal, the sex organs are formed. Girls are born with all of the eggs they will ever have, and boys are born with tools to create sperm.

It's kindof a done deal.

Despite the 'Transgender Mania' teachings of our present time, gender is not fluid.

Science clearly states that every DNA cell in the human body remains coded for our biological birth.

Sex reassignment surgery, with all of its advances, cannot change anyone’s sex.

At its simplest this means,

Removing or adding a penis doesn't determine sex.
Chromosomes do.

There's no pill, injection, etc., that can implant Womens' Intuition. Being a woman is a born divinity. Feminine cycles are connected to moons, and we bleed in time with their rhythms. Babies form and breathe under Motherskin. Surgery or no, men will never be able to get pregnant.

They can pretend though.

No artificial means can administer Womaness, no matter how badly someone wants it.

Ain't that right girlfriend?

Delving deeper into the arena of gender defining, is the belief that this new phenomenon is part of a larger agenda.

The “gender fluidity” debate is believed to be an artificially created propaganda set to blur the boundaries of gender, and to celebrate deviation from nature (as a great achievement).  The article  The Agenda Behind Bruce Jenner’s Transformation,  explained how Bruce Jenner’s very publicized sex change was part of this agenda. Furthermore, this urgent publicity surrounding transgenderism was to prepare the masses for upcoming global policy changes.

Months after Caitlyn came onto the scene, the mass media's propaganda evolved into laws and policies. From the “war of the bathrooms,” to the allowing of young children to undergo a sex change, modern society is shifting drastically towards new definitions of gender – a term considered binary since the beginning of time.

Camille Paglia, author, academic and social critic who's never shied away from controversy, explains how this is symptomatic of a wider cultural problem. In this video, she breaks down the implications of today’s transgender agenda. A lesbian and feminist, Paglia has always criticized the unrealistic constructs made in the name of “equality” and political correctness.

Many public figures who dare addressing these issues get promptly shamed and labeled “transphobic” and at times blackballed.  

We must remain aware that if mass media can turn something as clear and defined as a person’s gender into a tornado of confusion, it can redefine anything else to fit its needs.

However, there is a way to avoid falling into these traps and achieving the ultimate in freedom.

Love the skin you're in. 

-WTS.


Source

BJs.. Are no Breeze.

Blowjobs are work.

That's right, 

WORK.

Depending on the mouth it can be a "WERK!" situation.

BUT,

Blowjobs are a very physical task none-the-less.

And why are they called "blow" anyway? Sucking is what's involved.

Do men really know the mechanics of sucking a dick? (I'm referring to straight men, fyi).

To quote Samantha from Sex and the City, here are some things to consider..

"Teeth placement.
Jaw Stress.
Suction.
Gag Reflex.

All while bobbing up and down.
And moaning.

And trying to breathe.

They dont call it a JOB for nothing."

Well said Sam.

I would put a special emphasis on teeth placement. No man wants his dick raked by your incisors. Sometimes you have to fold your lips which can become a drain. And depending on how your positioned, sucking dick can be hard on the neck. Again depending on the woman, your hair may get in the way and yuck! Who wants pubes in their mouth? It does happen. Some guys have the nerve to have stray hairs on their shaft. No bueno.

All you men out there take note of this.

They may be called "blowjobs"..

But they aren't a breeze.


Thatizall.

-WTS.

YUM

There are no words really..

#YNTK

Men Wanna Be Loved Too..

I Wish I Had a D*ck..

If I had a dick, I would probably never leave the house.

I would be stroking it all the time. Talking to it..

"Hey Dick, you good? We havin' Chinese tonight??"

I'd play tricks with it. Be balancing stuff on it. I'd start with coins.. work my way up to cans or something. Maybe even bounce balls on it. No, not THOSE balls, other balls. I'd use it to drum on things. Make Dick rhythms like no otha..

When no one was looking, I'd use it to knock on doors.

And run.

'Ding Dong Ditch' would be 'Ding Dong Dick.'

Dress it up in old socks and do a horror puppet show, scare the cat.

Or more aptly put, scare the Pussy.

No Dim Wit, that's Dick Wit. *slaps knee with laughter*

The fun I'd have if I had a dick. We'd be best friends! I would use it to give lost women directions.

True they would slap me, but they'd know where they were going. My hero dick would see to it that they were Damsel in distress no more!

I would enter my schlong in dance contests, captivate the onlookers..

I can hear the crowd now..

"Go Dick! It'sya birthday..!"

I would make my dick pop-lock. Call myself Ozone, and my dick could be Turbo.

We would do a dance scene with a broom.

I'd have to massage my lovestick daily. Oil the folds. Up an down with my greased palm. Water based lube, no vaseline dude.

This ain't prison.

I would have my peen sung to..

"You... Light up my li-ifeee"


Yeah, I'd definitely sing to my dick. Especially the lower half, the darker part..

The Bone Zone.

My dick's name would be Bubba. Or Pharoah. Or, even more narcissistic, ZEUS.

My dick would be a GOD GODDAMMIT.

I wrote a poem about dick.

Like to hear it?' Here it GO..


wanna grow a DICK quick.
a really thick prick.
a longlaster
nunna that
jizz too quick shit.
cum as lipstick.
a penile icepick.
slip-n-slides
goes by the name of 'slickrick'
solid as brick
a penis with kick.
semen icecream
when given quicklicks.
from Ronald McTrick
to a tennesee hick
the celibate bit
does not make us tick.

Dick Power.

The Only Time A Woman Can Get Ready in 5 Minutes..

TRUTH!

Non-Condoned Condom..

Sometimes you don't need excuses. A good ole' hard edged NO works just as nicely.. :-D

A Hard to Get Man? Doesn't EXIST..

When a woman plays hard to get with a man, it's because she likes him. Like the proverbial 'dropping of the hanky', she gives him an opportunity to show he's interested by allowing him to pursue her (i.e., no rejection). How long and how sweetly he chases her, can demonstrate just how deep his interest lies. Plus, men like the hunt so why not?

HOWEVER,

When a MAN plays hard to get,

IT MEANS HE ISN'T AVAILABLE.

Whether he's in a relationship, or just doesn't like you enough, if a man wants to get with you, HE WILL. PERIOD. No waiting, no debating,

Just dating.

Then MATING :-)

And if he isn't trying to have sex with you, especially after a while, BE OUT. That's a reg flag right there. And don't fall for that "he's waiting because he respects me" gibberish. This ain't "Happy Days." A man can still respect you after sex, and if he's a man of any type of value or worth, sex will only make him want you more, not less. Don't make any excuses for why he isn't pursuing you. If his penis isn't chasing you, how could you think his heart is? If it's for a date or simply doing the do..

There's no such thing as a 'hard to get' man. If he is not giving you the same energy you're giving him, MOVE ON.

And if the guy's not interested in dating you, who cares? He's probably some closeted weirdo, secretly taking pictures of his ass when he's lonely..

And you don't want to date THAT now do you??

Didn't think so. Keep it moving ladies.. :-) Love you!

Drought Season.. Where the Fuck is the Fuck?

Romeo Romeo, where for art thou Romeo..

SEXXXXXX!

Why hath thou forsaken me?

It's a good thing I don't have a washing machine in my home. I would've probably electrocuted myself by now.

That reminds me..

I could use a new showerhead.. >:o)

Not for no stinking cold shower either. That's a guy thing. Women don't take cold showers. We get cold batteries and uh..

Get it buzzin.

And ain't no buzzin like remote control buzzin. The BEST vibrators have remote controls. They're just easier to manouver. You have better use of your hands too.

I know about 'blue balls' but is there a such thing as 'blue clit?'

I think I have it.

It's been soooo long since I did the deed. FUCK me for being so picky. For prizing my body. For knowing my self-worth. Pride is great but it does NOTHING for me in the wee hours when I'm alone and throbbing..

Hungry for sex.

Penis?

It's what's for dinner.

I've been climbing the walls..

And not the sugar ones either. Sorry Sheena.

On that note, I'll leave you with Ms.Easton showin us what happens when you get sexified by Prince..

You turn from a sweet Scottish princess whose baby takes the morning train, to a mullet wearin vamp sangin about how sweet the lining of your pussy is..

Umm.. Prince?..

When's my turn? #fucksopretty

The Snake That Looks EXACTLY Like A Penis..

Now here's a snake I would play with..


The unique creature, atretochoana eiselti, was found after engineers drained a hydroelectric dam which spans a river connected to the Amazon. Biologists discovered six of the unusual-looking creatures - each about a metre long - at the bottom of the river-bed on the Madeira river in Rondonia, in Brazil.

Atretochoana eiselti is blind and has been spotted near the mouth of the Amazon river, in warm and fast-flowing water. The creatures were discovered in November, however it took until today for scientists to correctly classify the snake's genus - confirming it is a rare creature which has only been spotted sporadically since first spotted in 1968.

 It is actually more closely related to salamanders and frogs, but appearance-wise looks more like a snake. Biologist Julian Tupan, who works for Santo Antonio Energy - the company which constructed the dam - said: 'Of the six we collected, one died, three were released back into the wild and another two were kept for studies. 'Despite looking like snakes, they aren’t reptiles and are more closely related to salamanders and frogs.

Mr Tupan added: 'We think the animal breathes through its skin, and probably feeds on small fish and worms, but there is still nothing proven. 'The Amazon is a box of surprises when it comes to reptiles and amphibians. There are still much more to be discovered.'

Just goes to show ya. The universe has the most awesome sense of humor of all..

Blow Job Occupational Hazard: Smegma

I learned about smegma in 7th grade. It was a trendy insult at the time, i.e.,

"That's why you're a paramecium covered in smegma!.."

We were rather intelligent youngins. We used names of microscopic parasites to diss each other. Like most young kids, when you first learn a new diss word you probably don't know its scientific meaning. In the heat of verbal battle though, it doesn't matter. The more syllables the better.

"You're a copulatory organ prominence!"

Translation?

You my friend, are a penis wrinkle. 

But I digress.

When I did find out the definition of smegma, virgin that I was and very unfamiliar with the penis and it's dermal productions, I became immediately grossed out by what I had been calling boys. Triumphant! But grossed out.

Nowadays, with jr. high long behind me, that shit is still gross. And fortunately, good ole' smegma, is still a top insult. If the opponent doesnt know what it means, even better. Put down the ipods for a sec and pick up a Scientific American, nahmean?

But I digress.
Again.

Sidenote: Why am I talking about this? Not sure. Maybe I have a dirty smegmated  mind.

I just made up the word "smegmated" btw. I so cleverrr..

To define, smegma (also known as "knob cheese") is a cheesy-like substance found in the foreskin on the head of a man's penis. If you see smegma, RUN FOR THE HILLS!! It means loverboy hasn't washed his dick. Or giving him the benefit of the doubt, he hasn't washed it well. It usually (if not always) occurs on men who haven't been circumsized.

Now, because it is something the body produces naturally, one could argue there is a positive reason for its production. That reason according to CIRP.org is:

"Is Smegma useful? Yes, certainly. It lubricates the cavity between the foreskin of the penis and the glans, thus allowing smooth movement between them during intercourse..."

Yeah yeah yeah. Sounds nice but fellas, especially if you have a Shar Pei for a dick, make sure you washy-wash. Ricotta cheese is for lasagna, not your Lovestick. Not only will the sight of smegma turn her off at that moment, but perhaps FOREVER. Nothing says 'no-soup-for-you' like the appearance of smegma when you're about to do Jawcercise.

Just to gross you out even more, (cuz I beez like that sometimes) I'll post a pic.

To anyone out there who enjoys giving blow-jobs, this is one of the severest occupational hazards. I mean it's just downright disrespectful. If a guy is lucky enough to be the recipient of a BJ, the LEAST he could do is be fresh and ready. The more I think about it, I'm just like gimme a break man! It's hard work to get a woman to say yes to dicklick action (without it being a business transaction). We think verrry carrrefully about it. If we do say yes and it's 'deed' time, you have the nerve to have fuckeeng smegma?! Who raised you??! There is one good point about smegma though. Unlike HIV or AIDS, at least smegma is visible. You can see it on the peeny, which should also show you that you're dealing with a bum ass dude who prolly showers at the 'Y' so kick him out ASAP.

Buckle up buttercup. Smegma pic in

5..
4..
3..
2..
1..

You got nervous huh? No but seriously..

No go wash yer' dick!!

The DealBreaker Series: He Can't Work The Middle

Disclaimer: This is to provide ENTERTAINMENT. Attacking comments will NOT be allowed and may be deleted. Feel free to voice your opinion, but this entry is meant to be humorous. Research was done yes, but this is not statistical data. This is a blog not a bible, so open your mind before continuing to read. Thanks.

What is a DealBreaker? If you know a man who's considered a good catch but is always single or never has relationships that last, he's probably a DealBreaker. Men who are DealBreakers are not necessarily bad guys, there's just something about them that women can't and don't commit to. Or if they do commit, they "uncommit" reasonably soon.

I suppose one could say the same for men with little dicks. And for the record, if your dick is not at LEAST 5 inches, YOU HAVE A SMALL DICK. If its THICK -but still less than 5 inches- you don't have a dick you have a cigar.

Some women -surprisingly- can be understanding about men with small dicks. Maybe they themselves are small, and don't require a man to be well-endowed. Depending on the woman, she could be happy just to have a man. If he treats her well (especially financially) and they have fun, some women can overlook it. Sex isn't everything right? *smirks* Who knows exactly why women stay with little-dicked dudes, but for most dick-loving women, a small dick is not something they can live with, i.e., a "DealBreaker." If a woman has to contort her body, like say, have her feet in back of her head, EVERYTIME they have sex just so she can feel it?

It's gonna get old soon.

Sex is supposed to be SEX not yoga. Whether its too skinny (Pencil dick), too short (Sausage), or just too small period, (Gerkin) when a woman is looking to build a relationship with a man, his dick size matters. And to the "Love Conquers All" theorists,

IT DOESN'T.

There are many women who love their small-dicked counterparts, but as you can see in the following clip, it can be mighty frustrating. Feel free to skip to the 35sec mark..

For those who didn't watch SATC, SHE ENDED UP DUMPING HIM.

And don't be fooled ladies. Men who have little dicks are aware they have little dicks. The same way women know if they have big breasts, a man so too knows that he has a small pecker. When taking a leak, a man shouldn't be able to piss on their balls. Sometimes they try to fool you by inserting their finger at the same time as their penis. (Like we can't tell, HA!) And beware of the guys that wanna ply you with alcohol and other mind-dimmers before sex. Little-dicked dudes have many little-dicked tricks to try and sway your attention from the fact that their dicks look like candidates for Pampers, not Fruit of the Loom. Fortunately with lots of little-dicked guys, they learn to do other sexual activities in attempts to compensate for their lack of inches.

If they're smart, they do them well.

Mouths, fingers, tongues, lips..all tools used to make up for the fact that his dick isn't his biggest asset. (Notice vibrators weren't mentioned? Vibrators are what women use when you're not there, not when you're there and not big). If his dick can't reach the spots and areas you need it to reach, then he should be fluent in other means of getting there. Depending on how talented he is in these sexual areas, he might be able to be kept. If not, there's a good chance he will be cheated on and ultimately dumped.

Lest not forget oral sex. Many women enjoy and are turned on by giving oral sex. When a man has a small dick, how fun is that?

Women stop sucking thumbs in elementary school.

And there's nothing worse for a woman, than sincerely being interested in a guy, and learning in that moment of truth, that his dick is just not big. That its NOT gonna be the headbanging experience she was hoping for. In these instances, small dicks can be more sad for women than it is for men.  

The good news is, there's hope! And better still, there's HELP. Enter, the Dick Sleeve. Dick Sleeves are a perfect option for guys that cant fill out their undies. They can provide girth, length or both. In this day and age, there's a plethora of dick sleeve options out there. They can be studded, ribbed or ticklish. Others can vibrate, spin and create other sensations a regular dick might not achieve. there are also dick extenders! They are slid onto the penis, and voila! A bigger more satisfying penis with no surgery. Condoms can also be worn over them. Most sleeves are relatively inexpensive.

Doc Johnson Big Warhead Sleeve, $11.95

Bigger and Better Clear Lovesleeve, $9.77

Pipedream Vibrating Sleeve, 21.95

Mega Stretch Penis Extension, $9.37

I realize men may be embarrassed by the idea that they could use the assistance of one of these products, but his priority should be his woman's pleasure, NOT his pride. Men with little dicks have no right to be selfish, and should be happy a woman is willing to try this alternative.


Otherwise, his teeny peeny might cause him to remain single indefinitely, and force him to retain his title..

as a DealBreaker.