Taking that "Till death do us part" line a bit seriously, eh fellas?..
Why would a man choose to kill his wife? To plot, plan, entertain the idea. Enlist abettors. Purchase the necessary supplies. Then execute?
These murders usually involve bizarre circumstances, and are often sensationalized by the media. They receive heavy coverage by news, magazines, talk shows and of course, social media. In the last 20 years "intimate killings" comprised 63.7% of all homicides.
So why has murder become a go-to for so many men?
The answer is simple.
These murdering men bend their minds to believe murder is less complicated and of course..
That they can get away with it.
That they can get away with it.
In the 1950's perhaps, but with today's forensics?
Not so likely.
A few years ago, Lisa Hartwick was riding in an elevator in Boston when she overheard a conversation between two men. One of the men was going through a divorce, and he was venting to his friend about lawyers and child support payments. At that point, Hartwick recalls, the man suggested, within earshot of everyone, that maybe he should just kill his wife, that it would be cheaper and easier that way. Hartwick, the director of the Center for Violence Prevention and Recovery at Beth Israel Deaconess Medical Center, was stunned. “I really didn’t know what to say,” she recalls. “Luckily, his friend said to him, ‘That’s a lot of money. I understand. I’m going through it myself. But you’ve got kids.”
Not so likely.
A few years ago, Lisa Hartwick was riding in an elevator in Boston when she overheard a conversation between two men. One of the men was going through a divorce, and he was venting to his friend about lawyers and child support payments. At that point, Hartwick recalls, the man suggested, within earshot of everyone, that maybe he should just kill his wife, that it would be cheaper and easier that way. Hartwick, the director of the Center for Violence Prevention and Recovery at Beth Israel Deaconess Medical Center, was stunned. “I really didn’t know what to say,” she recalls. “Luckily, his friend said to him, ‘That’s a lot of money. I understand. I’m going through it myself. But you’ve got kids.”
Question: Can you talk about whether spousal homicide is a growing epidemic?
Gavin de Becker: Is spousal homicide increasing? It is not, however the reality is more disturbing than an increase. Spousal homicide has remained a constant in our lives, such that every four hours at least one woman is killed in America by a husband or boyfriend. That uninterrupted and sad statistic can be changed, because spousal homicide is the single most preventable serious crime in America, largely owing to that fact that it
Gavin de Becker: Is spousal homicide increasing? It is not, however the reality is more disturbing than an increase. Spousal homicide has remained a constant in our lives, such that every four hours at least one woman is killed in America by a husband or boyfriend. That uninterrupted and sad statistic can be changed, because spousal homicide is the single most preventable serious crime in America, largely owing to that fact that it
A) Always occurs after many warning signs,
B) After several people are aware of the risk.
One of the most notorious cases of spousal homicide was the 1994 trial of O.J. Simpson, charged with the murder of his wife Nicole Brown Simpson. People were glued to the televised trial for weeks, and still speak of it almost 20 years later. Nicole left OJ with the intent of divorce and the rest is history.
75% of domestic homicides occur just after or during a wife's leaving of her husband. In most of the cases, the wife has a restraining order at the time of the murder.
Gavin De Becker: "Many homicides have occurred at the courthouse where women were seeking protection orders, or just prior to the hearings. Why? Because the murderers were allergic to rejection. They found it hard enough in private but intolerable in public. For men like this, rejection is a threat to identity, the persona, to the entire self, and in this sense their crimes could be called murder in defense of the self."
Joseph Romano, a Quincy iron-worker, killed and dismembered his wife, Katherine, in September 1998 with a power saw he had borrowed from a neighbor. He chose this, rather than leave, as his wife had apparently asked him to do.
The case of Dr. Dirk Greineder – a renowned Wellesley allergist who slit the throat of his wife, Mabel, to protect his secret sex life with prostitutes.
Richard Grundy, the chief of the Massachusetts attorney general’s office, persuaded jurors that Greineder not only killed his wife to protect his secret life with prostitutes but also planned the murder for months. Greineder’s goal: Make it look like a serial killer did it. “And to do that particularly,” Grundy said, “what he had to do was slit the throat, right down to the neck bone, of the woman who brought him three children.”
Of course, lots of men aren’t living their dreams. There are plenty who have jobs they hate but wives they love, so who exactly are the Charles Stuarts of the world?
“They’re narcissists,” says retired FBI profiler Candice De- Long. “Life is all about them.” Stuart, was said to show more joy over a great haircut than over the impending birth of his child.
“For narcissists, it’s not just that they love themselves,” DeLong says, “but it’s how others see them. Their image to others, to the world, is what’s really important. Most often, it’s a damning secret. Husbands and wives share things. They know more about each other than perhaps anyone else. And in a divorce, especially a nasty one, issues once locked away can go public in a hurry, shattering overnight reputations that took decades to build.
One of the most notorious cases of spousal homicide was the 1994 trial of O.J. Simpson, charged with the murder of his wife Nicole Brown Simpson. People were glued to the televised trial for weeks, and still speak of it almost 20 years later. Nicole left OJ with the intent of divorce and the rest is history.
75% of domestic homicides occur just after or during a wife's leaving of her husband. In most of the cases, the wife has a restraining order at the time of the murder.
Gavin De Becker: "Many homicides have occurred at the courthouse where women were seeking protection orders, or just prior to the hearings. Why? Because the murderers were allergic to rejection. They found it hard enough in private but intolerable in public. For men like this, rejection is a threat to identity, the persona, to the entire self, and in this sense their crimes could be called murder in defense of the self."
Joseph Romano, a Quincy iron-worker, killed and dismembered his wife, Katherine, in September 1998 with a power saw he had borrowed from a neighbor. He chose this, rather than leave, as his wife had apparently asked him to do.
About 10 years ago, David Adams, a licensed Psychologist, began visiting Massachusetts prisons to meet men who had killed the women they once loved. He wanted to ask that question "Why?" and discovered that their motivations fell into five categories:
1) Jealousy;
2) Drugs;
3) Career criminals;
4) Suicidal or depressed;
5) MATERIALLY MOTIVATED.
Men in the Materially Motivated category lack emotional involvement, remorse, and a conscience. “They don’t get jealous, because they don’t care much about women,” says Adams, “They care more about the assets, and are preoccupied with money.."
In July 2000, Dr. Richard Sharpe, a rich, cross-dressing dermatologist in Gloucester, shot and killed his wife, Karen, to keep her hands off $5 million in assets.Men in the Materially Motivated category lack emotional involvement, remorse, and a conscience. “They don’t get jealous, because they don’t care much about women,” says Adams, “They care more about the assets, and are preoccupied with money.."
The men involved typically, Adams says, are keeping secrets – secrets they will do almost anything to protect.
The case of Dr. Dirk Greineder – a renowned Wellesley allergist who slit the throat of his wife, Mabel, to protect his secret sex life with prostitutes.
These murdering men usually live in suburban homes, separated from others by their lawns and property- where neighbors can’t easily overhear fights (and hence are inevitably surprised when the wives turn up dead).They're not hardened criminals, but rather domesticated suburb dwellers. When the cops show up after these same wives turn up dead, the neighbors are shocked. Not here, they say. Not this guy. He wouldn’t choose murder over divorce, the risk of prison time over child support payments. He wouldn’t do this.
On October 23, 1989, Charles Stuart, who worked at a furrier on Newbury Street, shot his pregnant wife, Carol, in the head and then apparently shot himself as well. Stuart lived – just as he had designed it, while his wife and unborn child died – and went on to tell a sensational story about a black man who had robbed the white Reading couple. What Stuart really wanted, authorities later determined, was to open a restaurant with the money he’d get from his wife’s life insurance policy. When his wife became pregnant, that was taking him farther away from his dream. Once it was clear in January 1990 that he wasn’t going to get away with it, Stuart made a second decision: He jumped off a bridge committing suicide.
On October 23, 1989, Charles Stuart, who worked at a furrier on Newbury Street, shot his pregnant wife, Carol, in the head and then apparently shot himself as well. Stuart lived – just as he had designed it, while his wife and unborn child died – and went on to tell a sensational story about a black man who had robbed the white Reading couple. What Stuart really wanted, authorities later determined, was to open a restaurant with the money he’d get from his wife’s life insurance policy. When his wife became pregnant, that was taking him farther away from his dream. Once it was clear in January 1990 that he wasn’t going to get away with it, Stuart made a second decision: He jumped off a bridge committing suicide.
“They’re narcissists,” says retired FBI profiler Candice De- Long. “Life is all about them.” Stuart, was said to show more joy over a great haircut than over the impending birth of his child.
“For narcissists, it’s not just that they love themselves,” DeLong says, “but it’s how others see them. Their image to others, to the world, is what’s really important. Most often, it’s a damning secret. Husbands and wives share things. They know more about each other than perhaps anyone else. And in a divorce, especially a nasty one, issues once locked away can go public in a hurry, shattering overnight reputations that took decades to build.
This is the one of the biggest problems with men equating Net Worth with Self Worth. Mens' self-esteems are taught to be performance based. The acquisition of material possessions and status. One of the good many things about being a woman, is our self-esteem is not based on the same factors. It's ok for a woman not to be rich..
As long as she's pretty. (That's another entry though).
Whatever happened to "cheaper to keep her?" Murdering a spouse is costly. Not just the financial ruin one could face, but what about emotional and karmic debts?
Don't get a gun, get a really good lawyer.
Women want to live fairie tales lives too. If we don't get them, by no means do we have the right to slit our man's throat. You live, you adjust. If you're still unhappy, you LEAVE, and I'm not referring to leaving Earth. Ladies beware:
Does your husband have lots of life insurance on you?
Is he eyeing boats or expensive cars?
Is he researching topics like "Tropical Retirement Locales" and he's only in his 30s or 40s?
If you can say yes to two or more of those questions and he's NOT independently wealthy..
Don't walk.
RUN.
And Ladies..
Don't threaten to tell his secrets when you break up. He's a cross dresser who wears your panties and lipstick, and uses your basement as his 'HappyPlace' for dress-up? How lovely! Offer him a few of your dresses.
Don't ask for money. Ever. Pretend money is the last thing you care about. Tell him you're volunteered with Nicaraguan animal charities, and you've taken a vow of poverty. Giving you money would be an insult to God now wouldn't it?
Move far away, THEN get divorced. Let your greedy lawyer take half of his money while you hide in Central America.
Not sure if he's truly happy about your pregnancy? Tell him it's not your baby. You're merely acting as a surrogate for Beyonce's next child. The surrogate she used before is unavailable and Blue needs a sister.
Keep your eyes and ears open and ALWAYS trust your gut. If there's no love in your relationship get out, because LOVE is for living..
Not murder.
WTS.
Source 1
Source 2
Source 3
MOSAIC Threat Assessment - Gavin de Becker's tool to help determine if you're in danger or could be
Why Do They Kill? Men Who Murder Their Intimate Partners, by David Adams
As long as she's pretty. (That's another entry though).
Whatever happened to "cheaper to keep her?" Murdering a spouse is costly. Not just the financial ruin one could face, but what about emotional and karmic debts?
Don't get a gun, get a really good lawyer.
Women want to live fairie tales lives too. If we don't get them, by no means do we have the right to slit our man's throat. You live, you adjust. If you're still unhappy, you LEAVE, and I'm not referring to leaving Earth. Ladies beware:
Does your husband have lots of life insurance on you?
Is he eyeing boats or expensive cars?
Is he researching topics like "Tropical Retirement Locales" and he's only in his 30s or 40s?
If you can say yes to two or more of those questions and he's NOT independently wealthy..
Don't walk.
RUN.
And Ladies..
Don't threaten to tell his secrets when you break up. He's a cross dresser who wears your panties and lipstick, and uses your basement as his 'HappyPlace' for dress-up? How lovely! Offer him a few of your dresses.
THEN get divorced. You can tell his secrets in your book.
Don't ask for money. Ever. Pretend money is the last thing you care about. Tell him you're volunteered with Nicaraguan animal charities, and you've taken a vow of poverty. Giving you money would be an insult to God now wouldn't it?
Move far away, THEN get divorced. Let your greedy lawyer take half of his money while you hide in Central America.
Not sure if he's truly happy about your pregnancy? Tell him it's not your baby. You're merely acting as a surrogate for Beyonce's next child. The surrogate she used before is unavailable and Blue needs a sister.
Then have your baby in a town he's never heard of.
Yeah you heard right.
Seriously ladies. If your husband or boyfriend is extremely verbally abusive and/or hits you..
He can also kill you.
Get out of any unsafe relationship because women DO die.
Threats are carried out, and some men would rather kill you than divorce you.
Keep your eyes and ears open and ALWAYS trust your gut. If there's no love in your relationship get out, because LOVE is for living..
Not murder.
WTS.
Source 1
Source 2
Source 3
MOSAIC Threat Assessment - Gavin de Becker's tool to help determine if you're in danger or could be
Why Do They Kill? Men Who Murder Their Intimate Partners, by David Adams
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