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Friday, April 26, 2013

The Most Sexually Kick-Ass Songs By Women.. Part I

Welcome to one of the most comprehensive lists of the most sexually aggressive /slash/ kick-ass songs by women. Before we get into the music, understand why this post was a must-do.

As forward and sexually aggressive as women can be,

It can still be treated as taboo.

Society has become majorly progressive, but it still judges women and places restrictions on how we "should" and "should not" behave, especially as it pertains to our sexual interactions. Men still like to be the aggressor for the most part, and women - who like to be the aggressor and go after what they want sexually - run the risk of being negatively labeled.

Whore.
Slut.
Loose.

Sadly, Confident hardly ever makes this list. Oddly enough, Confidence is exactly what it takes to be this bold.

We wanted to showcase women who had the guts to be sexually provocative. Women who made their propositions LOUDLY, and didn't need permission. Brazen females who let it be known in their songs:

FUCK ME.

Many of these artists were banned, boycotted and criticized by religious figures and the like because of their sexually unapologetic music.

Damn straight they deserve some accolades.

SO,

With that little tidbit out of the way, lets get into tunes, shall we?

Requirements for the list.

A) The women had to be themselves. More specifically, the women had to have songwriting credit on the song. If SHE wrote it, chances are, SHE meant it.

AND/OR,

B) Delivery. The delivery of the lyrics is most important because that's where the EMOTION lies. The stand out, in your face BOOM! And if you're asking a guy for sex, it's not exactly the time to be Minnie Mouse.

There was no way these songs could be numbered in order of greatness, so they're listed alphabetically.

Last, make sure you actually WATCH the videos. Don't just read the description and keep scrolling because you won't get the full effect. This compilation can blow your mind if you let it.

And we're off!

PART I: The Most Sexually Kick-Ass Songs By Women


26) Apollonia 6,  'Sex Shooter,'(1984). Patricia Kotero replaced Vanity in the the movie Purple Rain. Although considered one of "Prince's women," Apollonia makes no bones about the fact that she was merely hired help. While asking us to "come on and kiss the gun," she's stated emphatically that she was NEVER Prince's girlfriend. Employee or not, if Prince hired her to be sexy, he got his money's worth. 
"Sex Shooter"


26B) Vanity 6 also recorded "Sex Shooter" before the Apollonia days. Her version is an honorable mention..
"Sex Shooter" by Vanity 6
 



25) "Might Like You Better" by Amanda Blank (2009). Amanda Blank is super badass. Hailing from Philly, this rapper's lyrics are ALWAYS in your face and no holds barred. She is bold and she's knows it. She's worked with producers Spank Rock, Diplo and Dave Sitek. She's toured with label mate Santigold and (lucky fuck) opened for Peaches. She released her first solo album in 2009.


"Might Like You Better"



24) "If I'm Lucky I'll Get Picked Up," Betty Davis (1973). This song reached number 66 on the Billboard Charts. Married to Miles Davis for a year, Betty moved to London after her divorce and worked as a model. She came back to the states with the intention to work with Santana, but instead pursued her own music. Sexually rebellious and loud, many of Betty's songs were attacked by religious groups. This resulted in lack of radio play by stations who feared boycotts. Betty was a woman who was truly years before her time. She officially stopped recording music in 1979. Even the title "If I'm lucky I'll get picked Up" shows that Betty was not afraid to reveal her sexual inclinations through her music. What a fucking awesome song title.. and Woman!!

   "If I'm Lucky I'll Get Picked Up"



23)  "Take It Off" by The Donnas (2002). They're propositioning a guy, asking bluntly, "Why don't you break me off?" Reminiscent of the Runaways, the Donna's (who go by Donna 1, Donna 2, Donna 3 and Donna 4) used be known as 'The Electrocutes.' They're currently working on an album despite their original drummer having to leave the project due to a shoulder injury. As live performers, these women are electric and can definitely break any crowd off.

"Take it Off"



22) "Sugar Walls" by Sheena Easton (1984). The second single from her, 'A Private Heaven' album, this song was publicly criticized by televangelist Jimmy Swaggart for its sexual lyrics. It was written by Prince under the pseudonym Alex Nevermind, and reached number 3 on the R&B charts. Sheena was a nice girl before she hooked up with Prince. She went from singing about her baby's morning train to the lining of her vagina. This song is definitely direct and upfront. Would you like some sugar with that?..

"Sugar Walls"



21) 'Kiss Me Deadly' by Lita Ford (1988). "Went to a party last Saturday night, didn't get laid but that's alright.." During the 'Hair Band' era, Lita Ford (formerly of Glamrock band the Runaways) held her own and held it down for the ladies. 'Kiss Me Deadly' was named the 76th best Hard Rock Song of All Time. Currently, Lita's voice and likeness can be found in the XBox and Playstation3 video game 'Brutal Legend.' In this video, I love the way she acts like she's riding a guy at..1:43. Classic.

 "Kiss Me Deadly"
 



20) 'Freak Like Me' by Adina Howard, (1995). A confessional into her Freakdom, this single went certified Gold when it was released. The downside was, this song pigeonholed Adina into singing only about sex. No one took her seriously as an artist and her career hit its plateau with this single. She's currently working on her Culinary Arts degree.

  "Freak Like Me"
 



19) "Funk Me," by H.W.A. (1990). H.W.A. stands for Hoes Wit Attitudes. With a name like that, what type of music would one expect? Every song they did was related sex. "Funk Me" was the first single off their first album titled 'Livin in a Hoe House.' This same album offered the song "Little Dick" which is one of my personal faves. The song is hilarious, and this groups brutal honesty about what they want and their feelings about all things sex is unmatched. H.W.A. is currently touring select dates, mostly overseas.
"Funk Me"
 



18) "Tattooed Love Boys" by Chrissie Hynde (the Pretenders, 1979). In this songs Chrissie sings about "target practice in the hole." I love it. Singing to the tattooed love boys she once teased, they showed her "what that hole was for." The band the Pretenders was formed AROUND Chrissie in 1978. She was the star and needed mates to back her. Always fearless and honest in her music, Chrissie Hynde is a musical legend. This 80's punk rock-new wave jam is the perfect song to taunt any guy.

"Tattooed Love Boys"



17) "Slow Tongue" by Millie Jackson (1983). The QUEEN of dirty talk in music. No topic was taboo. She sang about fucking your man, you fucking my man, can you fuck like a man, fuck you and lick it motherfucker.

Millie was no joke.

She's a phenomenal entertainer as you'll see in this clip. Talk about BOLD, Millie not only talks the talk she walks the walk- ON STAGE. "Slow Tongue" is one of the most outrageous performances by a woman and during it's heyday, made many people uncomfortable. She sang about sex and it's relatives during a time when women were still very much expected to stick to their to gender roles. Currently, she hosts a radio show in Atlanta and has been doing so for the past 17 years. Millie Jackson is absolutely the QUEEN of Fuck songs. Google her and find out yourself.

"Slow Tongue"


16) 'My Neck My Back' by Khia, (2002). One hit wonder Khia doesn't make you guess what she wants licked: Her NECK, her BACK, her PUSSY and her CRACK and in that order. Lick it now, lick it good. According to Wikipedia, she was describing both cunnilingus and anilingus. She supposedly wrote this song in 15 minutes. I'd never heard the term "anilingus" before reading about her. Alrighty then.
 
"My Neck My Back"
 


 
15) "Do Me" by Jean Knight, (1972). Given the year it was released, this song was provocative for its time. Jean was most known for her song 1971 hit "Mr. Big Stuff," which was on the same album. She was later known for her '80s hit, "My Toot Toot" in which she declared, "I know ya gotta another woman, so don't mess with my toot toot." What a cute way to tell someone to fuck off, no? In this song Jean asks her lover to "do me baby, like a natural man, any way you can." Sang with lust and confidence, this song communicates what Jean wants and how she wants it.

"Do Me"



14) Lil Kim, "Big Mama Thang," (1996). When the first line of a song is "I used to be scared of the dick, now I throw lips to the shit, handle it like a real bitch.." One can gather that when it comes to sex, Lil Kim ain't so "lil." Raunchy and ready, Lil' Kim established herself as a sexually aggressive vixen. She could fuck you and fuck you up. Whuh Whuh..

"Big Mamma Thang"



13) "Justify My Love" by Madonna, (1990). Written by her (alleged) ex-lover Lenny Kravitz, this video was banned by every major music video outlet for its extreme sexual themes, including girl-on-girl intimacy. If you listen, you can hear the moans and groans of Lenny singing background vocals. This song is fucking incredible, and one of the sexiest, most sensual songs ever made.

"Justify My Love"



That concludes Part I, but there is one honorable mention. I was going to include this as "Best Song About Masturbation" but in light of new information, that's changed. We say a very peaceful Goodbye to Chrissy Amphlette who died on April 21st after battling breast cancer and Multiple Sclerosis. She was the lead singer of The Divinyls, famous for their 1991 hit "I Touch Myself." Initially about masturbation, upon learning she had breast cancer, Amphlette began using this song to encourage women to give themselves breast exams. She implored women to "touch themselves" in the name of health. She is survived by her husband of 14 years, Charley Drayton. 


The Divinyls, "I Touch Myself"




If you feel any songs were left out or should be on this list, feel free to leave links, names, etc in the comments.

We love raunchy songs by women. By all means, if you can recommend some, do so dammit. :-)


Part II coming soon.

WTS.







 

Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Working Hard..

Working working working.

RESEARCH is the name of the game right now. Working on several entries, wanting to update with substance.



I haven't forgotten you lovely readers.


Stay tuned :)


And my diet is going well.


:-)


Thursday, April 11, 2013

I've Gained Weight..




I've gained about 8-10 pounds. I like how my weight gain looks on me but not on my "pooch" (area below the belly button). I've always had a flat tummy, and have no intention of losing it now.

These extra pounds are the result of a recent discovery:

I LOVE BREAD.

I think I went off the deep end with it though.

Focaccia.
Parmesan bread.
Onion bagels.
With butter of course.
Toast with my frittatas.
Pizza.
Garlic knots with the pizza.

And my absolute fav..

Pita bread with balsamic vinegar and olive oil. I could eat this as a meal anyday.

Time to say goodbye though.

Bread, backoff you Fatmaker.

Seeing this made me feel better..





Monday, April 8, 2013

Well Said Abiola..



"The only man you can change is one wearing diapers."

-Abiola Abrams

Which to do, Which to do..

Hrmmm..

All the pieces I'm working on, what should I post next..?

The one on sperm? Fun facts you don't know..

The one on the "......"? (I'm not telling the topic just yet but it's good..)

The first in the "Mommy Complex" series? (Mother's might hate me for this one but oh fricken well. They're not the ones who have to date who they raise..)


The 'Nasty Girl' musical edition? (This isn't about the girl group fyi..)

Maybe I shouldn't give away what's happening behind the scenes..



F*ck it.


Which do you want next?